I was just reading on a blog that gives book recommendations/reviews for parents and their children. One page had a list of the 75 books that would build character. I had never heard of most of them because they are rather new, but I was a little upset to see The Giving Tree wasn't on it. I figured maybe because the author seemed focused on newer books, that was the reason. No big. But as I scrolled down to the comments, people seemed THRILLED by the fact that this book wasn't on the list. Literally, EXCITED to see someone who didn't like it either.
And I was confused. So I went looking for other reviews. Because quite frankly, I can't see how anyone could take the message in The Giving Tree to be bad. Afterall, the title is "The Giving Tree."
People hate this book.
Not all, mind you. But many. It breaks my heart. All they see is a selfish boy who becomes a selfish man who kills the tree he loves.
Uh. No.
My main focus in this story was always the tree. Not the boy. But the tree. Sure, a lot was also on the relationship between the two, but the title says tree because it's about the tree.
When the boy is young, his relationship with the tree is very healthy. They play together all day and enjoy each other's company. They love each other. But like is the case with most childhood friendships, the boy grows and finds new interests and doesn't visit the tree anymore. But the tree wants the boy to be happy, because his happiness brings her happiness. So she's ok with that so long as he is happy.
Well he comes back one day and he needs a house to keep him warm. So the tree offers the boy her branches to build a house so he can be happy. Later he wants to sail the earth to escape the sadness he has encountered in his adult life, so the tree gives him her trunk so he can build a boat. Then he comes back, a lonely, sad, old man and the tree openly says she has nothing to offer him. The man says how he is old and doesn't need much now. All he needs is a quiet place to sit and rest. And the tree in all her stump-ness straightens up proud and firm and says something like "Stumps are very good places to sit." So the man sits on the stump to rest. And the tree is happy.
I love this book because it opens with the tree and boy together and even though the boy grows and leaves (tree references, ha!), he comes back and they are together again in the end... Plus it shows the value of giving. That in the end, life is about how you give back to others, and not about what you get. The tree was always happy. Because she always gave the boy things he "needed." But the boy would come back sad and lost and lonely because he was focused on himself. The tree was happy though. And their relationship evolved so that as they grew and aged together, the wiser one (tree) taught the boy (after a lifetime of tries and fails) that she knew what she needed to do: give what she had for others who had less to benefit. And in return, she got a friendship from someone who had been blessed by her gifts.
I used this story as a basis for my wedding party invitations because I thought it explained how I feel about my husband. I would give absolutely anything if it would make my husband happy. Anything. His happiness makes me happy and it hurts me knowing I can't always help him when he needs it. If I could though, I would. Plus, something I've always struggled with is that the acquisition of things doesn't really matter. And I want to teach my children that. The boy in this story learns that eventually. As an old man, he sees he doesn't really need much. Just somewhere to sit and rest. No need for a big house or a boat or a plethora of apples to stuff his face. Just a seat. Nothing extravagant. So he sits and enjoys his time with his tree. <3
Maybe I've grown to appreciate it because I've oversimplified it. I dunno. But I love this story and I will stand by loving this story till the day I die because to me, it has meant so much and shown so well the love one person can have for another and how important it is to remember it isn't about WHAT we have, but how we share those things we've been blessed with, and to also remember THINGS aren't important. People are.
So that's my take. Continue hating it if you must. I'll disagree with you, so if you decide to battle me about it, I won't stop fighting. But go ahead. Have your opinion. Take a sweet child story and make it terrible. (This reminds me of how people take Beauty and the Beast and make it dirty. Come on, people, it's supposed to be metaphorical, stop talking about beasteality and such. Good grief.)
Hokay. Thanks. Later.
Jasmine
